


Out Of My Head

by sherlocks_left_nipple



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Boyf, Boyfriends, Cute, Domestic Fluff, Drinking, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fighting, Flirty, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Gay, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Making Love, Making Out, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Partying, Post-Squip, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Sex, Smut, boys, riends, smut???
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2018-12-04 18:31:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,916
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11560926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sherlocks_left_nipple/pseuds/sherlocks_left_nipple
Summary: Jeremy and Michael heal...TW: Self-harm, Anxiety, and Self-LoathingRated Teen and Up for smut and sensitive topics, as well as languagePlease let me know what you want from future chapters :)





	1. Scarred and Scared

**Author's Note:**

> I REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOY!!! 
> 
> sadly I have not read the book yet or actually gotten to see the play but I have listened to the soundtrack and picked up as much information as I could from tumblr so pls forgive me for any mistakes!!

Jeremy knew something was wrong. 

 

Yes, after getting rid of that computerized parasite things were out of balance with him and Michael, but it was more than that. Things had seemingly gone back to normal. That was only until one night at Jeremy's house.

The two boys had spent a night playing video games and joking. It was the first sleepover they had since the Squip. Jeremy was excited. Things were finally going back to normal. It had gotten late and Michael was ready to go to bed.  
The two of them were getting ready to go to bed, but Jeremy noticed that Michael hadn't changed into his pajamas. It was hot as hell and Michael still stood in his jacket and jeans. 

"What's wrong?" Jeremy asked, pulling on a shirt. He stat on the bed, long limbs flopping onto the bed with absolutely no grace. "I can leave the room if you wa-" 

"No. No it's fine." Michael interrupted, his hands fidgeted nervously. He turned around, facing Jeremy's closet door. Michael only wore his boxers and an old shirt to sleep in. He got into bed, not looking as Jeremy as he got under the covers. 

Jeremy frowned. He and Michael were always very close and never had a problem sharing a bed. Jeremy worried he had made Michael uncomfortable. Maybe he'd overstepped some boundaries. Maybe Michael knew how he felt...

Jeremy knew how he felt about Michael. He knew he loved him. And not just in a "no homo" way. Yes, Michael was gay, but Jeremy knew their relationship was fragile and didn't want to mess it up. Jeremy decided it was best that he kept his feelings to himself. After all, he was just a lanky, odd teenager, and how on earth could someone like Michael have feelings toward him?

"I-I...I can sleep in the guest bedroom." Jeremy suggested, sitting up awkwardly. 

Michael sat up and looked at Jeremy with a frown. "Why?" He asked, looking much like a small, innocent puppy.

"You just seem...off. I don't wanna push you. I know things are still...weird." Jeremy attempted to explain, fidgeting. Michael stayed silent, causing a bubble of anxiety to grow in Jeremy's chest.

Michael's face fell as Jeremy made his way to the door. "Please...Don't go." He said, reaching for Jeremy. The duvet on the bed fell away, exposing Michael's arms and thighs that were covered in scarring and marks. 

A dead silence fell as both boys saw the scars.

"I-I S-" Michael stuttered to come up with an explanation and pulled the covers back on, as if that could fix anything.

Jeremy dived into the bed and pulled Michael close. He held him tightly and buried his head into Michael's neck. Tears began pouring down Jeremy's cheeks. 

When they were in middle school, Jeremy knew Michael hurt himself, but since High School he had stoped. He smoked and as much as Jeremy hated the smell, he knew it helped keep Michael clean so he didn't complain. 

Michael's arms had never look like that.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry." Jeremy sobbed. He knew why Michael relapsed. Even if he didn't want to admit it, deep down they both knew it was because of the Squip. 

"Jeremy...Jeremy." Michael pulled away, wiping his eyes before cupping Jeremy's face. "It's okay. It-"

"You're cutting again, Michael! How is this in any way okay?!" Jeremy yelled, causing Michael to flinch. Jeremy's features softened. 

"You're so good to me. We've been through everything together...if I had know that the things I did and said made you do this....I would have pulled that Squip out of my head with my own two hands." Jeremy sobbed. 

Michael felt tears roll down his cheeks. He sighed. "I..." He had no idea what to say. Jeremy was right. If he had never been Squipped...Michael would probably still be clean. The voices that had controlled him in his head for most of his life wouldn't have reappeared with such hateful things to say. That didn't mean Michael didn't love him though. Michael would go to the ends of the earth for that lanky boy. He would throw himself in front of a train...

"Please, Michael. Let me...let me make it all up to you. I know I can't, but please...let me gain your trust back. Let me try to fix things." Jeremy croaked and, oh god, how could Michael say no to that?

Michael nodded, letting a small sob escape his mouth before he embraced Jeremy in a warm hug. 

A silence fell between the two boys, aside from the occasional whimper or sniffle.

"I love you." Michael eventually whimpered into the crook of Jeremy's neck. He was practically sitting in Jeremy's lap at that point.

Jeremy rubbed Michael's back, his head resting on top of Michael's. "I love you too."

Michael sighed. He knew Jeremy probably didn't mean it in the same way he did, but it made Michael happy to say it out loud and hear it said back. 

He beamed like a ray of sun at the small boy he held tightly to his chest. "You're my world. And I want to spent the rest of my life making you smile...I never want to see you this hurt ever again." Jeremy admitted, laying his head on Michael. 

Michael sobbed again, holding even tighter onto Jeremy. 

The two emotionally charged teens fell asleep in each other's arms, loving each other far more than anyone could ever explain.


	2. Party On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy and Michael go to a party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited to have written this! All the feedback is amazing!! 
> 
> please comment and leave kudos if you enjoyed and let me know what you want from the next chapter :)) 
> 
>  
> 
> my instagram for musicals is @michaels.left.nipple XD

Light broke in fragments through the window of the bedroom. Michael grumbled, burying his head unknowingly into Jeremy's chest. Michael liked to cuddle when he slept. 

Jeremy had been awake for a little bit. He awoke to Michael's hair tickling his nose and his unusually warm body clinging to him. 

It was moments like this that Jeremy wished he could save and reply in his mind until the day he died. 

They were young. They had so much ahead of them. College, Jobs, maybe even a family one day... Jeremy liked to believe that if he some how managed to finally tell Michael how he felt, that one day the two of them might have a beautiful life. 

They were both badly damaged from the Squip and the insecurities that held their minds hostage. They were healing, though. And things would change. It crushed Jeremy to see the scars that covered Michael's beautiful body. 

Jeremy ran his hands through Michael's hair and shyly pressed a kiss to his head, praying he wouldn't wake up. He wanted nothing more than to protect and love Michael for the rest of their lives. No, they weren't together, and Jeremy probably would never get the guts to ask Michael out, but Michael was an angel to Jeremy and needed to be protected. He was so good and so pure.

Michael began to stir, groaning. "It's too fuckin bright." He mumbled into Jeremy's chest. Jeremy laughed. 

The night before left both boys a little drained. Jeremy watched Michael as he began to really wake up, sitting up on the bed.

Jeremy's phone buzzed loudly while Michael began to change clothes. 

"Who is it?" Michael asked, buttoning his jeans. 

"Jake. He and Rich want us to come to their party tonight." Jeremy said, also getting dressed. 

Michael often felt awkward around Jeremy's new friends. He could never quite tell if they just tolerated him for Jeremy or if they genuinely liked him. Not only that, but Michael didn't really have fond memories involving parties...

Jeremy sensed Michael's discomfort and offered him a small smile. "We don't have to go." He said softly. 

Michael shook his head and finished pulling on his clothes. He sat down next to Jeremy. "I'm just...scared." He replied. "I wanna go with you and make friends. I'm just worried you'll ditch me again." Michael murmured, playing with the hem of his shirt. 

Jeremy frowned, hugging his buddy close. "Never. I'd never let that happen again." He promised. 

Michael sighed and relaxed into Jeremy's arms. "Alright. Then we'll go." He smiled softly. Jeremy smiled back and ruffled Michael's hair. "It'll be fun."  
Jeremy nodded and sighed. "I guess we should go get ready for tonight." Michael nodded and off they went.

 

The smell of weed and alcohol was apparent as Jeremy and Michael walked through the door of Rich and Jake's party. 

The two boys found their way over to the kitchen where Jake and Rich were doing shots. 

"Hey! Looking good, Mikey!" Rich said. Jeremy glared, feeling unusually jealous. If looks could kill, Rich would be very, very dead. 

"Oh relax Jer Bear. I have no interest in your boy toy. I'm a taken man now." Rich laughed, leaning in to Jake. Rich and Jake were obviously very drunk and we're all over each other. 

"I see that." Jeremy laughed awkwardly. Jeremy turned to Michael and smiled shyly.  
"Want a drink?" He asked

Michael nodded. The two of them mixed some drinks and downed them almost instantly. 

Michael clung to Jeremy through out the party. Later in the night, Jeremy had to use the restroom. Michael sat awkwardly in the kitchen and waited for Jeremy to come back out. 

Michael was definitely one of the more sober people at the party. Rich drunkenly stumbled into the kitchen. He smiled at Michael. 

"Aye! Mikey!" Rich greeted. Michael smiled. "Hi." He said. 

"When did you and Jeremy start dating?" Rich asked, grabbing a random bottle off the counter and swishing around the liquid inside. 

Michael laughed. "We aren't." 

"Aww mannn! Did you reject him?" Rich pouted. "Pour *hiccup* guy." 

Michael raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?" 

"He really likes yoooooou." He slurred. "Jake and I have a bet going on. We're waiting to see which one of you decided to grow some balls and ask the other person outttttt." Rich took a swig. 

Michael's face went red. Jeremy liked him. Jeremy actually liked him. 

"Shhhh tho it's a secret." Rich said, putting his finger to his lips. 

 

The party raged on and Michael began to feel very anxious. There were so many people and it reminded him far room much of the Halloween Party. Michael tugged Jeremy's hand and he felt his throat tighten. 

"Jeremy, can you come outside with me?" He asked softly. 

Jeremy turned away from watching a game of spin the bottle to look at Michael with worried eyes. "Sure. Of course. Let's go." 

Michael and Jeremy went outside and sat on the porch. Jeremy wrapped his arm around Michael and leaned his head on him. He didn't ask what was wrong. He knew. Jeremy held Michael close. 

Michael gripped Jeremy's shirt. "Too many people." He mumbled. Jeremy nodded. He looked at Michael. 

"Can I ask you something?" Michael asked softly. 

Jeremy looked worried and nodded. "Of course."

"Why aren't we dating?" 

The question really took Jeremy by surprise. 

"Huh?"

"Well Rich told me how you feel and I obviously feel the same and we cuddle and you kiss my head when you think I'm asleep so you obviously like me and if you just don't want to be embarrassed by me I underst-" 

Jeremy interrupted Michael's run on sentence by kissing him softly. He held Michael's face and then slowly pulled away. 

"I love you. And not just in the no homo way. I just didn't wanna screw anything up." Jeremy said shyly. "And there's no way I could ever be embarrassed by you, you dork." Jeremy smiled softly. 

Michael looked absolutely dumbfounded. "Oh. Well I love you too, obviously." 

"So...does this mean we're dating?" Jeremy asked. 

"You haven't asked me out." 

Michael crossed his arms and looked at Jeremy, waiting.

Jeremy laughed and straightened his spine, sitting up nicely. 

"Will you be my boyfriend?" He asked nervously. 

"Of course. Now kiss me." 

Jeremy waisted no time pressing his lips against Michael's. It was nicer than before now that both of them knew it was coming. 

"Hell yeah!" Rich appeared from the doorway. "Who asked who?" Rich gestured clumsily at the two of them with an empty beer bottle. 

"I asked." Jeremy said, laughing. 

"Fuck I'm out 40 bucks." Jake came out from behind Rich and dug out his wallet. 

"You two are assholes." Michael laughed.

"And you two are boyfriends." Rich replied smoothly. 

Michael covered his face. He was beaming. And nothing on earth could ever make him feel as happy as he did in that exact moment.


	3. The Angsty Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pls don't hate me it was requested imsorryimsorryimsorry

**_"Come on, Jeremy. Do you really need him?"_ _The Squip asked, arms crossed. He smirked._ **

**_"Of course I do! I love Michael. He's my world."_ **

**_"Well he wont want you after what I have you do to him..."_ **

**_Jeremy could only watch as the Squip took control of his body, forcing him to push Michael up against a wall. His own hands were used to punch and beat Michael until he crumpled up on the ground, sobbing. His leg kicked him. Jeremy could hear a crack. He wanted to puke. Michael coughed out blood and looked at Jeremy. He looked so hurt. So heartbroken._ **

**_Tears poured out of Jeremy's eyes as the Squip released his control, leaving Jeremy to see what he had done._ **

"NO!!!" Jeremy woke up, covered in sweat. He was crying. He felt sick. It seemed so real.

Since Michael and Jeremy got together, the nightmares that Jeremy had were all targeting him. The Squip had left a lasing impact on their lives and on Jeremy's mind. Jeremy frequently had nightmares involving The Squip. Some days, completely out of the blue, Jeremy could hear The Squip whisper things to him.  **"You are nothing without me, Jeremy."** Sometimes he could feel tiny shocks when he'd do something that The Squip normally wouldn't have approved of. It scared Jeremy. What if it came back? What if he couldn't get rid of it this time? What if...What if it made him hurt the love of his life?

 

Jeremy's hands shook as he grabbed his phone. It was 3:24 am. Jeremy was still sobbing uncontrollably when he typed in Michael's number and called him.

 

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

_"Jeremy?"_

Jeremy could only choke out a sob. 

_"Oh, baby. Are you okay? I'm coming over, just breath. I'll bring some Red."_

Jeremy nodded, although Michael obviously couldn't see him. "Thank you." He croaked.

_"Of course. I'll be there soon. I love you. It's gonna be okay."_

Michael hung up and Jeremy reached under his bed for one of Michael's sweatshirts. He tugged it on. It fit him sort of awkwardly since Michael was shorter than him and had a different body type, but Jeremy didn't care. It smelled like Michael. Jeremy hiccuped and wiped his eyes with the shirt sleeves. 

 

In about half an hour, Michael arrived. He climbed in through Jeremy's window, not having a key to the house and not wanting to wake Jeremy's dad. Michael climbed in to the room. He could feel his own heart shatter once he looked at Jeremy. Michael crawled into bed with his boyfriend, pulling him close. "Hey. I'm here. It's okay." He murmured.

  
Jeremy let out a sob once his eyes landed on Michael. He held him tight, crying into Michael's shoulder. "I had the nightmare ag-gain." He sobbed. 

 

Michael frowned. He rubbed Jeremy's back. "Shhh, it wasn't real. I'm okay. It's okay." Jeremy was all that mattered to Michael. Yes, Jeremy had said and done some less than kind things when he was Squipped, but Michael knew that Jeremy loved him and if he had been thinking clearly he would have never done that. "I wish I could take all this pain for you." He said softly.

Michael pulled away, handing Jeremy a can of Mountain Dew Red. Even if it didn't really completely get rid of the Squip, it helped Jeremy feel better. 

Jeremy took the can, downing it almost instantly. He had finally stopped crying. He held Michael's hands and squeezed them gently. "Thank you. You're so good to me." He murmured. "I'd never want you to have to deal with this, though." Jeremy let out a shaky sigh and laid down, hoping for Michael to lay with him.

Michael held Jeremy to his chest. "It won't come back." He swore, running his fingers through Jeremy's hair. "And even if it did, we would handle it together. You're my everything...I wouldn't be who I am if I hadn't known you." Michael kissed Jeremy's head and let him fall asleep in his arms.

They would heal and would one day find peace...it would just take time. Michael knew they could do it. They would make it through...Together


	4. When He Sees Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Jeremy finally catch a break and it gets smutty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope this doesn't suck :P + the title is from a song in Waitress. The song has nothing to do with the chapter but its pretty good. 
> 
> WARNING IF YOU ARENT COMFORTABLE WITH SEXUAL CONTENT PLEASE SKIP THIS CHAPTER

Jeremy thought often about how lucky he was.

He and Michael sat under the stars. Michael laid his head in Jeremy's lap as they looked at the bright shining lights above their heads. Jeremy found himself at a loss for words when he looked at the beautiful boy below him. God. He was everything Jeremy had ever wanted. Michael Mell opened up a door in Jeremy's heart and mind that he never wanted to close. Jeremy was so happy. For once in his less than extraordinary life, he was content and at peace.

Jeremy Heere was in love.

Michael's eyes sparked something deep inside Jeremy. He was the light of Jeremy's life. Jeremy wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with Michael. He had never felt this way about anyone before. He was so in love, so happy. The world was truly a better place to Jeremy ever since he'd managed to get together with Michael. 

Michael sat up. He placed himself in Jeremy's lap and straddled him. His arms wrapped around Jeremy's neck. "What are you thinking about?" he asked softly. 

Jeremy blushed. "How lucky I am." He answered honestly. He pressed a kiss to Michael's forehead. Jeremy took a deep breath, inhaling the smell of Michael's shampoo. "I'm so in love with you." Michael beamed at that. The two of them were preparing to go back to school and they had both been busy. It was good for them to have a night like this. Michael kissed Jeremy slowly, running his fingers through Jeremy's hair. He pulled Jeremy close. Jeremy wrapped his arms around Michael's waist. Once the two of them broke apart, Jeremy felt a warmth rush through him. It was rare that Jeremy's mind was ever quiet enough for him to enjoy life, but Michael seemed to quiet his head. He was an absolute godsend to Jeremy. 

The two began kissing again and the two of them eventually decided they were ready for the next step in their relationship. 

 

 

Michael and Jeremy rushed into Michael's basement. It felt like the best place and the most important place to share this moment. Jeremy pressed soft kisses down Michael's neck as the two of them laid on Michael's couch, Jeremy hovering above Michael. Michael let out a shaky breath. He chewed at his bottom lip and let his eyes flutter shut. Jeremy slid his hands up Michael's shirt. Michael laughed softly as Jeremy nervously fumbled to take off his own shirt. Jeremy knew he was lanky, if not a bit awkward looking, but if anyone was going to see him naked, Jeremy wanted it to be Michael.   
Michael reached up to pull Jeremy back down to him. They kissed slowly and romantically. Jeremy's hands returned to Michael's chest. Neither of them were perfect. They had flaws and imperfections, but to one another, they were immaculate. Jeremy had never felt more connected to someone in his life than to Michael. They were truly each other's other half. 

Michael shyly shed his clothes and was clad only in his boxers, as was Jeremy. Jeremy made a point of pressing a kiss to every scar on Michael's tan skin. "You are so beautiful." Jeremy murmured. Michael felt his eyes glaze over with tears. He felt so loved. And he was. Jeremy smiled sympathetically as a tear rolled down Michael's cheek. Jeremy wiped away the tear and planted a kiss gently where it had been. He left little love bites on Michael's chest. He promised himself he would make sure that their first time was focused on Michael, not just having sex or fulfilling a primal urge. Jeremy kissed Michael's forehead once again before shyly reaching his hand into Michael's boxers. Michael shivered as Jeremy wrapped his hand around his member. 

Jeremy did what he knew made himself feel good. This left Michael a moaning mess. He gripped at the couch cushions. Jeremy pulled off Michael's boxers as well as his own. He took a very small bottle of lube out of the pocket of his jacket that laid on the floor. He looked at Michael. "Are you sure, Micha?" He asked softly. "We can stop if you aren't ready." Jeremy was fully prepared to stop if that was what Michael wanted. He respected and adored his boyfriend. He wanted him to be comfortable.

Michael smiled and nodded. He was nervous as any person would be, but was also excited. Jeremy smiled back and kissed Michael gently. He whispered sweet nothings into Michael's ear as he opened the bottle of lube. He stroked his cock slowly, covering it, before pressing gently and slowly into Michael. Jeremy took Michael's hand. He peppered Michael's face with kisses. Michael cried out in pleasure and pain. 

Jeremy spent several hours making love to Michael, doing everything he could to make Michael comfortable. Once both of them had reached their climax, Jeremy cuddled Michael. He held his lover close, wrapping a blanket around them.

Jeremy had never been so in love. They had both been through so much together. All they ever wanted was to be happy. And they finally could be. Jeremy swore to himself that he would one day marry Michael. Jeremy pressed a kiss to Michael's head "I love you." Jeremy murmured gently into Michael's hair. Michael turned to face Jeremy. "I love you too, dork." Jeremy laughed softly at the teasing phrase. "You are my world." Jeremy told Michael. The two of them kissed again. They laid there, admiring one another, until they fell asleep in each other's arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please comment bc it keeps me alive and share if you wanna :))


	5. Creep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeremy protects Michael

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I JUST STARTED SCHOOL AGAIN SO IM SORRY MY UPDATES ARE SO INCONSISTANT I LOVE YOU PLEASE ENJOY

Jeremy Heere was not usually one to get jealous. 

Yes, he had his moments, but he trusted Michael. Jeremy knew he was dating an amazingly attractive guy, so he shouldn't have been surprised at the amount of men and women that flirted with Michael. Michael was a very friendly person. That was something Jeremy admired about him, but when Jeremy began to notice that some people were more interested in Michael's ass than the conversation they were having, Jeremy was pissed.

Jake had thrown another rager. Jeremy and Michael planned to just stop by for a bit and then they would go watch a flick at Michael's place.

Sadly, that was not the case. Jeremy, wo had been right at Michael's side, some how managed to lose track of his boyfriend through the smell of smoke and dancing bodies that filled the house. He finally managed to spot Michael some where across the room, where a tall, handsome man spoke to him. Jeremy could feel his face flush in jealousy and annoyance. How did someone manage to steal Michar's attention so fast? Jeremy frowned and began pushinmg through the crowed. As he got closer to Michael, he could hear bits and pieces of the conversation. 

"I-I I'm not interested." 

"Come on, good lookin'. I promise I'll be worth your while..."

"I have a boyfriend!"

"He doesn't need to know..."

Jeremy realized how destressed Michael sounded as well as how inapproperate the other guy was acting. He saw at the man pushed Michael up against the wall and Jeremy lost his mind. He quickly pushed his way over and shoved his way inbetween Michael and the other guy. 

"He isn't interested." Jeremy stated firmly. He took Michael's hand in his and realized that he and Michael were both shaking. The guy was significantly taller than both him and Michael, but Jeremy wasn't afraid. He was pissed. How dare anyone think they could treat Michael like that?!

"Jer, please, lets just go." Michael murmured, tugging Jeremy's arm.

"Well I am." The guy said, crossing his arms. "And I get what I want." He reached to take Michael's wrist.

Something in Jeremy snapped. He lunged, knocking the man to the ground. He threw a few swift punches and kneed him in the groin. 

Jeremy pulled away, face dripping with sweat. His hands shook. He kicked the guy firmly in the stomach before taking Michael and pulling him away from the madness. Jeremy cupped Michael's face in his hands. "Are you okay? Did he touch you? Are you hurt?" Jeremy blurted out the questions quickly, scanning his eyes over Michael with concern.

Michael let out a breath. "I'm okay, just shaken up....thank you Jer." Michael gave Jeremy a soft kiss. "I only want you. God, that guy was such a creep." 

Jeremy nodded and held Michael close. "I'll never let anything like that ever happen to you." He said softly.

Jeremy helped Michael file a police report about the creep before taking home. It would kill Jeremy if that guy was allowed to roam the streets and do awful things to other people.

Jeremy took Michael home and vowed to protect him from all the evil in the world. No one deserved to go through that kind of hell. Especially not someone as pure and gpood as Michael...


	6. Just Breathe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael has a bad day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank u guys for putting up with my shitty updating schedule I will try to get into the habit of actually finishing the chapters in a reasonable amount of time lol <3

Michael Mell was not a fan of high school. Yes, he was always the one who gave Jeremy pep talks and assured him that they’d be fine, but Michael absolutely hated school.

Michael had a long day. With kids making snide comments about Michael’s appearance and his teachers seeming to not understand that there was no way Michael could get a project done in two days, Michael was ready to collapse. When the last bell rang, Michael slugged his way over to his locker. He opened it and grabbed his bag. Michael was about to leave when he felt a warm, familiar presence behind him. Michael turned around and let out a sigh of relief at the sight of Jeremy.

“I haven’t seen you all day. I was starting to think you were hiding from me.” Jeremy said, giving Michael a shy smile. 

Michael sighed. He hugged Jeremy tight and closed his eyes. This took Jeremy by surprise, causing him to drop his bag. Jeremy quickly came to his senses and wrapped his arms around Michael’s waist. 

“Are you okay? What’s up?” Jeremy asked softly. He began to rub Michael’s back comfortingly. 

Michael felt a lump on his throat. He was like a volcano. Michael bottled up his emotions until a day like this would occur and he’d explode, either in rage or tears. 

Michael just shook his head and finally let go. He pulled away and looked at Jeremy helplessly. 

Jeremy gave Michael an empathetic look and nodded knowingly. “Let’s get you home, okay?” 

Michael nodded and took Jeremy’s hand. The two of them grabbed their bags and walked down the hallway, out to the parking lot. 

 

Michael and Jeremy got to Michael's house after the quiet drive. Michael was very quiet and the only noise that filled the car was the humming of the radio. 

Maybe a year or so ago, Jeremy would be scared by Michael’s silence. He had since learned that there were some days that Michael just couldn’t talk. He needed to be in his own head for a bit. Jeremy understood that. 

Once Michael pulled up to his house, he opened the car door and walked Jeremy inside. 

The two of them walked to Michael’s bedroom. Michael flopped onto his bed and whined. 

Jeremy gave a sympathetic smile to his boyfriend’s exhausted appearance. Jeremy didn’t speak as he climbed into bed with Michael. Jermey opened his arms and let Michael curl up against his chest. 

“It’s been a rough day.” Michael murmured into Jeremy’s chest.

Jeremy nodded and carded his fingers gently through Michael’s hair. He knew all too well how awful school could make them feel. Jeremy pressed a kiss to the top of Michael’s head. 

“You’re gonna get through this. You’re gonna do great things, Michael Mell. I promise.” Jeremy murmured. 

Michael hummed and pulled away to look up at Jeremy. “You matter so much to me. I’d never have made it this far without you.” He said softly. It was clear a few tears had passed through Michael’s eyes. 

Jeremy gave Michael a soft smile and leaned in to kiss him. “You’re my whole world. We’re gonna be okay. We’ve just gotta take it day by day.” Jeremy said once they parted. 

Michael nodded and went back to laying in Jeremy’s arms. 

That was one of those moments that Michael tried his hardest to remember every detail of. He knew in that moment that he really truly loved Jeremy. He loved him more than anything in the whole world. Jeremy gave Michael the kind of love they wrote books about. Jeremy was the kind of person Michael wanted to spend the rest of his life with and, god, he hoped more than anything that he would. 

The two of them slept in each other’s arms, wanting nothing more than to be in the other’s company.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omf pls comment suggestions for other chapters and things I can do to be a less shitty writer I love you guys thanks for putting up with me


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